Changed Lives

Since my last interview, my family has continued to grow as we welcomed our daughter Nora Jean in June 2019.

I have also made the transition to working back at Crossroads. I am currently the Development Director and the thing I love most about working at Crossroads is they deeply care about my me and mental health. They help in any way they can, which includes time off to stay on top of my mental health.

Since leaving the Mission, staying clean has probably been the easiest part while staying on top of my mental well being has been the most trying. It helps to work for a Christian organization which helps people with the same struggles as myself.  It makes coming to work not only a joy but also has a real positive impact on my mental health.

Even though my stay at the Mission was well over 10 years ago, the lessons that I learned while there continue to impact not only my own life, but also the lives of my family, and anyone I come across. I am much more aware and sympathetic to people struggling because I have struggles.  Being around the people at the mission make me open to share about my personal struggles and not feel judged.

Without  Crossroads in my life, I definitely think my life would look a lot different.  But God had a plan when he put Crossroads in my path and I have been blessed with a beautiful wife, two beautiful children, and lots loving friends and family.

When Debra’s husband died very suddenly at just 49 years old, he had no life insurance. She exhausted nearly all of their savings paying for his funeral and her income wasn’t enough to pay the mortgage and all the bills.

After struggling for a few years, she decided to move to Nebraska, where her daughter was just starting a family of her own. Debra moved in to help with the baby, but after a few months she needed a place of her own and heard about a room for rent through a friend of hers.

Debra developed a relationship with the man who owned the home, but it wasn’t long before she realized what a dangerous man he was.

He dominated and controlled her, isolating her from friends and family, destroying her driver’s license and making her a prisoner in her own home. “The bruises wouldn’t heal before he’d hit me again,” Debra remembers.

Debra finally escaped one night when the man went out for a drink, and thankfully she found her way to Crossroads Mission Avenue. “I felt at home here for the first time maybe in my whole life. They’re my family. We’ve got an amazing community here and we have everything we need. I’m so thankful,” Debra says. “If it weren’t for the donors, none of this would be possible. This place and the people here – they saved my life.”

Kairy comes from a loving Christian home, and he’s not sure what led him down the path of alcohol addiction. Maybe it was the racism he experienced growing up in Georgia. Maybe it was the stresses of life when he moved out.

Whatever triggered it, Kairy dove into the deep end, battling the bottle and bouts of homelessness. He got in trouble with the law and did some time in jail.

When on probation, the court ordered him to move to a transitional living facility. Kairy chose Crossroads. It might’ve been the best decision of his life.

Kairy got sober, got counseling, got a good job, got all the help he needed.

“They’re good people,” Kairy says of the Crossroads staff. “They stand on good things. They helped me with my mental state, with coming back into society.”

Writing poetry has also helped. Kairy, who goes by the pseudonym Kûpid for his rap-like rhymes, saying his writing keeps him calm and focused. Here’s just a snippet of his work:

I once was lost but now I’m found
But what I lost is nowhere around
My heartbeat I heard, but is it how I sound?
Eyes start to drown as they gaze upon love’s crown …
What I’m trying to say is every blessing is a count

Kairy’s certainly counting his blessings … starting with supporters like you.

“I can only imagine where I would be without Crossroads,” he says. “This is a good place. They always give you a helping hand.”

When you give someone a helping hand, it’s an extension of your compassion. Thank you!

After an argument with his ex-girlfriend got out of control, Spencer hit rock bottom when he landed in jail, but it was somehow exactly where he needed to be.

It was during his time in jail that he heard about Crossroads Mission Avenue. He wasn’t sure about it at first, but he quickly learned that it was the right place for him.

He entered the program and was making good progress, but then he met someone new and decided to move in with her. That’s when he says he felt the Holy Spirit and knew he wasn’t ready to be on his own. So he made the life-changing decision to return to Crossroads, worried he’d fall back into the old habits.

Surrounded by caring people and the mental and spiritual support he needed, Spencer is now working hard to improve his life. He’s even gaining job skills by working security and answering phones at Crossroads.

“If it weren’t for Crossroads, I’d be in a world of trouble,” Spencer says. “I’m doing good now.”

Your support is behind the care and guidance Spencer found at Crossroads Mission Avenue. Thank you for helping him choose the path to renewed life!

The 1990s were a terrible, tragic time in Russia.

Though communism had been abolished, the country spun into economic and cultural chaos. Crime and lawlessness prevailed. The economy was in shambles. Things got so bad, average life expectancy went down.

Yevgeniy had wanted to get his family out for some time. When his wife suffered a debilitating accident at work and was unable to get the medical care she needed, Yevgeniy felt even more urgency to leave. So he packed up the family and set off for a new life — first in Canada, and then in the U.S. The family of five, including two sons and a daughter, would find a place to start fresh … and hopefully get the medical attention Yevgeniy’s wife needed.

Unfortunately, the dream never materialized. Yevgeniy’s wife never got better, Yevgeniy’s own health started to decline as well and the bulk of the home duties — cooking, cleaning and caring for her parents and brothers — fell to their young daughter, Alena.

Alena, overwhelmed by the responsibility of being a caregiver, started using drugs to cope. Then, when her mother died in 2012, Alena fell hard into a heroin habit. Yevgeniy, devastated by his wife’s death, drank heavily to cope. “Her death knocked me off my feet,” he says. “I never understood loneliness until she passed. I felt really lost. Drinking helped me relax and helped me cope with my feelings.”

The family was in bad shape. Alena ended up in prison on a drug charge, serving two years. When she was released in 2020, she ended up at Crossroads. Here, she received help kicking her drug habit, getting back on her feet and changing her life dramatically for the better. She wanted that same transformation for her father.

Since Yevgeniy also came to Crossroads, he has turned his life around, too. He has quit drinking, he’s much happier, and his relationship with his children — all adults now — has significantly improved. Particularly with Alena.

“Today, my state of mind is feeling freedom,” Yevgeniy says. “I feel like I’ve started a new life, but I know my time is running out.”

Yevgeniy has numerous health issues. And while medical intervention has helped, he is now living with Alena and her boyfriend, who care for Yevgeniy. Their father-daughter relationship is stronger than ever.

“My whole life, my dad was absent — not physically, but emotionally and mentally,” says Alena. “We never had any conversation. But now, we sit down and have great conversation. You can see in his face that he’s happy. It’s such a good feeling to have a relationship with your parent that you’ve known all your life, but you feel like you just met.”

You help people find a new life at Crossroads. Thank you for giving people the hope of renewal!

For Cole, the choice was a no-brainer.

He could go back to jail and lose his job. Or he could go to Crossroads Mission Avenue and keep working. He didn’t have to think about it: Crossroads, of course.

Cole was fortunate to even be given a choice. He’d been in trouble with the law before, and spent two years in jail on multiple charges. When he was released in April 2020, he was on probation and warned to stay out of trouble. But a few months later, he was busted for driving while intoxicated. That’s when his probation officer gave him the choice.

On being given a second chance, Cole says, “I was really thankful.” Crossroads is all about second chances. We’re a place of grace. “They’re not judgmental,” says Cole, 27. “They don’t look down on you.”

Cole, a longtime alcoholic, hasn’t had a drink since that DUI. He credits Crossroads, and God, with his transformation. “I’m a completely different person,” he says. “I love being sober, and I have no desire to use again. I don’t need alcohol or drugs to set off good feelings in my brain. I’m really high on life right now.”

Cole, who is Native American, adhered to his culture’s spiritual beliefs for most of his life. But at Crossroads, he discovered Christianity, and has fully embraced it. “I’ve had a spiritual awakening,” he says. “Now I believe in the Holy Trinity — God, Son and Holy Spirit.” He’s motivated to stay sober. He has a good job in the manufacturing business, and he’s looking forward to getting his own place again.

“I’m just going to keep working hard,” he says. “Thanks to Crossroads, I’ve got a new view of life.”

Thank you for all you do to help people turn their lives around.

Robert, 55, has lost count of how many times he’s been to Crossroads Mission Avenue over the last 10 years or so.

Each time, it’s been for the same reason. “Drinking,” he says. And each time he’s left, same reason: “Drinking.” And never in moderation.

“When I drink, I take it to the max,” he admits. “I’ve lost friends, I’ve lost jobs, I’ve been kicked out of bars, all from drinking too much and acting stupid.”

Robert has recently come to believe he’s been repressing anger and trauma from his childhood. He vividly remembers his father abusing his mother when he was just 3. And he recalls his mom saying cruel things to him during his teenage years.

“But when I drink, all that goes away,” he says. “No cares, nothing.”

Robert likes coming to the Mission because, he says, “They always give you a chance to redeem yourself.” Each time he returns, he builds on his experience and gets a little closer to victory over his past.

This time, he’s been here for nine months and has worked his way up to a position of leadership. He makes out the list of daily chores and serves as an on-call worker at night. He also has the gift of empathy, especially for those with mental health issues. And he has a calming manner.

This Christmas season, Robert particularly embraces the gift of grace he’s found at the Mission, and he’s more committed than ever to remaining sober. He’s almost 200 days clean!

“I don’t want to let the Mission down,” he says, “because they’ve been so good to me.”

You inspire positive change for folks in recovery. Thank you for showing them the compassion they need.

Everybody falls on hard times, but do you know where can you turn for help??

In the midst of picking up the pieces after her sister’s death, Vanessa was in a serious car accident.  Brake failure caused an accident which totaled her car, and she was left without transportation.

Through a collaboration with Salvation Army, Crossroads Mission Avenue was able to help.  A generous donor had given a car to Crossroads, which provided for her need!

Vanessa is so grateful, sharing, “When I was at my lowest and thought all hope was lost, Crossroads came through for me!  I am so blessed that there are people out there who help those in need!”

I grew up in a family that used drugs and alcohol. That’s all I really knew. My family rarely talked about God. I’d used drugs and alcohol since I was 14 years old and I was dependent upon it somewhere around the age of 20.

My addiction has put me in the hospital several times. I’ve spent 2 solid years homeless at the age of 26. Ever since then, I’ve bounced in and out of treatment centers and never been able to maintain a healthy lifestyle. I came to Hastings to try to find a fresh start and something new. I found Crossroads.

Crossroads has taken a different approach to deal with my addictions and sin nature. They’re teaching me now to think different, be responsible and change old habits. But most important, they’re helping me gain a connection with Jesus Christ. Truthfully, I haven’t been this happy in a long time. For the first time in a very long time, I have hope again, and a joy that no drug can replace.

Deborah had always felt accomplished. After all, she’d raised two fine children in Hastings. And as a fully degreed accountant, she’d enjoyed a successful career for over 30 years. But everything changed in an instant when Deborah suffered a stroke and subsequently lost her job and home.

Having also lost her voice from the stroke, Deborah was placed in a nursing home, where she underwent intensive voice therapy for several months. When she finally completed her treatment, she came to Crossroads Mission Avenue because she could no longer afford a place of her own.

Through the support of friends like you, Deborah was welcomed with safe shelter and nutritious meals. But just as important to her is the emotional support and community she’s found. “Here, I have a sense of purpose,” she says. “I am a viable person.”

Looking to pour her energy into something, Deborah was thrilled for the opportunity to help out in our Thrift Store. And our staff helped her plug into a government program that pays her for the hours she works.

With her Thrift Store job and social security income, Deborah was recently able to move into her own apartment a few blocks away. She continues to work at the Mission Avenue Thrift store, which she loves and takes great pride in. And she is eternally grateful for the love and support she’s received, amid her unique circumstances.

“That’s what Crossroads is all about,” Deborah says. “All walks of life… different walks of life… and we’ve all got a story.”